The Gifts of Imperfection by @BreneBrown

This summer, I had my choice of three books to read: The Way of Mindful Education by Daniel Rechtschaffen and Jon Kabat-Zinn, The Road to Character by David Brooks or The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown.  I decided on the last because the library had a copy of it.  It was not what I would expect my new school to ask for us to read but the theme was Self Awareness. I might have to read the other ones too.

Here are some of my favorite quotes:

“Knowledge is important, but only if we’re being kind and gentle with ourselves as we work to discover who we are.”  “Courage, compassion, and connection seem like big lofty ideals. But in reality, they are daily practices that when exercised enough, become these incredible gifts in our lives.”

She uses the acronym DIG for Deliberate, Inspired and Going.

“Courage originally meant “to speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart.” “Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.”  “The better we are at accepting ourselves and others, the more compassionate we become.” “..it is impossible to practice compassion from a place of resentment.”

“Somehow we’ve come to equate success with not needing anyone.”  “Many of us are willing to extend a helping hand, but we’re very reluctant to reach out for help when we need it ourselves.” “…hustle for our worthiness by constantly performing, perfecting, pleasing, and proving.”

“We are biologically, cognitively, physically, and spiritually wired to love, to be loved, and to belong. When those needs are not met, we don’t function as we were meant to.”  “Practicing self-love means learning how to trust ourselves, to treat ourselves with respect, and to be kind and affectionate toward ourselves.”

“Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.” “Shame resilience is the ability to recognize shame, to move through it constructively while maintaining worthiness and authenticity, and to ultimately develop more courage, compassion, and connection as a result of our experience.” “Shame needs three things to grow out of control in our lives: secrecy, silence, and judgment.”

“Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are.” “Authenticity means cultivating the courage to be imperfect, to set boundaries, and to allow ourselves to be vulnerable; exercising the compassion that comes from knowing that we are all made of strength and struggle; and nurturing the connection and sense of belonging that can only happen when we believe that we are enough.”

“Life-paralysis refers to all of the opportunities we miss because we’re too afraid to put anything out in the world that could be imperfect.” “Perfectionism is self-destructive simply because there is no such thing as perfect. Perfection is an unattainable goal.”

“Hope is a combination of setting goals, having the tenacity and perseverance to purse them, and believing in our own abilities.” “Tolerance for disappointment, determination, and a belief in self are the heart of hope.” “it’s our fear of the dark that casts our joy into the shadows.”

“Marianne Williamson says, ‘Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are.'”

“Intuition is a rapid-fire, unconscious associating process – like a mental puzzle.” “Calm as creating perspective and mindfulness while managing emotional reactivity.” Calm . ..”People who can bring perspective to complicated situations and feel their feelings without reacting to heightened emotions like fear and anger.”  “Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” by Howard Thurman.

“Criteria for meaningful work – complexity, autonomy, and a relationship between effort and reward.”

Check out www.self-compassion.org

Reading this book made me realize that we are all imperfect. We should love our imperfection. We should look for the good in everything and we should dance as if no one is watching.  Great, easy, fast read.

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